How are you feeling, really? I’ll be honest, I’m tired lately. With this bustling time of year and the state of the world, I imagine you may be too. So let’s take a beat, a brief pause for a scan of your body - yes, right this moment! Take a big deep breath in, really feel the air filling your lungs. Now start at the top of your head, and slowly work your way down through every part of your body. Simply notice how each part feels - not how you want it to feel or how you think it should feel - but how it really feels. Don’t judge it, simply notice it. When you find any tension, breathe into it and release.
I’ll gently ask you again: how are you feeling, really? Getting into our body, taking note of how we truly feel without judgment, takes courage. Often what we find isn’t what we’re hoping for, yet it’s the first step toward healing.
In the spirit of taking care, I’m sharing six ways we can all take care in the busyness of the coming weeks and months. They’re simple enough to reach for in even the most hectic of circumstances (ie. a house crammed with family or friends on Thanksgiving :)) Try them out and hold onto what works for you.
Incorporating mindfulness exercises into my work with my clients helps ground for our sessions and acts as a reminder that these exercises don’t take a lot of time or effort - they simply take practice. Engage in them when you’re not feeling distressed - like when you’re standing in line with your groceries or curled up on the couch with your pup - so when you do find yourself in a heightened state, your body already knows how to shift into grounding mode.
My pup is top among my list of things that keep me clear headed. Yes, for his wild enthusiasm for simply being alive and his soft furry cuddles that always calm me, but mostly for his need to be outside. He gets me out into the sunshine (or rain, ha!) first thing every morning. His little wet nose pokes under my elbow midday to let me know when it’s time for a break. If there’s no dog in your life - don’t fret! You can still take walks even if you’re simply a human! Fresh air, sunlight on your face, and easeful movement for your limbs can bring a fresh perspective and a much needed reset.
I write to you from The City That Never Sleeps with encouragement to not follow suit. Sleep is good! Let’s all sleep more! I often wonder how so many operate on such little sleep. I’ve been playing with routines in the evenings as I search for habits flexible enough that I’ll stick to them and nourishing enough that they contribute to my sleep hygiene. As proof of my imperfection, I’ll share that I stayed up working on my laptop until just moments before padding into the bedroom the past two nights. It doesn’t feel good and my jaw is tense, so tonight, my goal is to put my laptop away and my phone in its charging station at least thirty minutes before I make my way into the bedroom. I’ll pour myself some warm honey water and curl up with my current read on my couch next to my glowy lamp. Specific enough to imagine it playing out, simple enough to actually make it happen. Wish me luck and interesting dreams!
Earlier in the week I was having A DAY, so I called a friend for an impromptu stroll and oh the relief and lightness I felt when we hugged goodbye after our chatty walk. The exhaustion of adult life can make planning friend dates feel like work, but even a quick cup of tea, a short facetime, a brief text can nourish your human need for connection. It’s better to connect in haste than not at all - it doesn’t have to be perfect and planned!
Set yourself up for healthy stress management by preparing a list of activities you enjoy that help you unwind. When you feel an impulse to numb or escape, take a moment to pause - don’t judge! you are human! - read through your list and reach for an activity, even for just a few minutes.
Here are a few from mine: read an enticing novel, journal, page through a pretty book, quilt, walk with my pup, collage, pinch a little pot, lay on my dog’s bed and look at the sky through the fire escape.
Sometimes a really good cry can feel soothing and bring relief. If you’re finding yourself crying often, it may be a sign to reach out for help, but an occasional self-soothing cry can bring you into your feelings. Added bonus, it releases oxytocin and endorphins - so go ahead and let the tears fall every once and a while.
Wishing us all a good enough holiday week. May we all carve a little time to take gentle care, even if just for a moment.
I gave my therapy and artist internet spaces a refreshing new vibe
Melting honey from a honey dipper into warm lemon water has been my evening comfort
Somehow my pottery workshops keep getting dreamier
‘If this resignation leaves a hole in the news the size of poetry, then that is the true shape of the present’
I’d love to curl up in a cocoon house
ps - I have space for a couple of new clients in my psychotherapy practice! You can find out more and schedule a time to chat here.
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I love this post. It's beautiful, gentle and GRACEful. ❤️🌾